Birth Order

I’ve been learning a lot about myself in the past few weeks. My current job situation is none and I’m educating myself on a new career! In that, I read a book called “The Birth Order Book” by Dr. Kevin Leman.

Have you ever wondered about why you are the way you are and how it applies to you your life?

I started reading this book because a girlfriend recommended it to me. We’re both obsessed with personality tests and learning more about ourselves. The thing that I love Dr. Leman writes in the beginning on the book is

Yes, there are exceptions to the standard birth order rules but the exceptions are explainable when you understand how birth order works. Even the exceptions develop because of when you were born into your family. I call it your “branch on the family tree” and that branch has had a great deal to do with why you are the way you are today. – page 13-14

This amazing book talks about why first born children tend to be the leaders and are such perfectionists and driven. He explains middle children or if the second born is the first of their gender. And then the babies…

And I am a baby. The most interesting thing of the book is that he mentions how family dynamics can shift your birth order (personality). If you are the second born and the first born has a disability, you can take on the traits of the first born. Or if the baby of the family has a disability, it can change things.

Dr. Leman goes on to talk about how having a critical parent can effect your birth order. You can also jump your birth order if you out shine your older sibling in something.

Guess what, I jumped my birth order.

Due to having a critical parent and an older sister who couldn’t handle our mom’s emotional abuse, I was her protecter. I was the older sister. I fought back for her. I put myself between her and my mom and turned my emotions off for 24 years because I could, she couldn’t (I’ve learned to turn them back on).

My sister’s birth order is the first born girl, but second born. So she is also a middle child. Taking her birth order also meant becoming a mediator. When my parents fought, I was the mediator (a middle child’s role).

I still have my salesman / manipulative baby personality. But it is so fascinating to learn about why I am the way I am.

If you love learning about yourself, your family and those around you, I HIGHLY recommend the book!!


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